Real or Not Real? The Question You Should Often Ask Yourself.

One of my favorite series of all time is the Hunger Games, not just the movies but the books are an even better read with so many metaphors for how we live today. I do eventually want to write one day about the main point I feel Suzanne Collins is trying to get to when she wrote the book series, but today I want to focus on one sub-story from the last book “Mockingjay” . In that book, one of the most pure characters in the series, Peeta, starts the book by being held prisoner by the Capitol. They tortured him for most of the beginning of the book and feed him slow doses of tracker jacker venom (think murder hornets). The venom is deadly but in low doses it warps the mind and perceived reality.

Halfway through the book, Peeta is rescued from the Capital and taken to District 13 which is the rebellion’s base of operations. Katniss, the girl that Peeta unconditionally loves, is excited to see Peeta and embrace him. Shockingly, when she enters the medical room that Peeta is taken to upon arrival, Peeta quickly and forcefully moves to strangle Katniss. The Capitol had warped his mind to the point he thought Katniss was the cause of all his suffering. The Capitol had successfully taken the one thing that Katniss thought could never be taken away, Peeta’s love for her.

This storyline evolves during the rest of the book with the medical staff for the rebellion trying to reverse what the Capital had done to Peeta. It is a slow and painful process, especially for Katniss. Ultimately as Peeta gets better, the therapists he is working with suggest and exercise to help him sort through what actually happened in his life. They encouraged him to make a statement and ask someone in the room that was with him in that “memory” Real or Not Real? That person would then respond to Peeta with the appropriate answer if the memory he was having was real or something that the tracker jacker venom put there. For example, “I participated in the 75th Hunger Game” response “Real”.

This plotline really makes me think, how many of us are like Peeta and have had our minds warped, not by tracker jacker venom, but by the pressures and expectations of society? How have our minds been altered to the point where the things we once loved are now points of pain in our lives, because we can’t remember why we loved them or let ourselves remember why. The stress of being a responsible adult, being liked by our peers, wanting to be seen as successful, wanting to be admired for our beauty gets to us and many more things warps our love for those we love and the things we love to do. Those yearnings in and of themselves are not bad, but seing them through a warped lens just leads to suffering.

I have been reading a book called “Loving What Is” by Byron Katie recently. In this book she talks about her system for flushing out the false storylines we tell ourselves in our head each day through 4 questions. The first question is “Is it True?” and the second question “Can we absolutely know its true?”. These questions are a real life example of the exercise that Peeta is taught during the Hunger Game. How often do we question our own thoughts, especially the negative ones that populate our minds each day. “They will only love me if I am successful”, “I am not smart”, “My family doesn’t appreciate me” “My spouse doesn’t love me like they use to”.

These are just a few of the stories we tell ourselves and we never question them in our heads. Are they true, can we know that they are really true? If not, why do we allow them to control how we think and act. It is what we all do, it is our human nature and it is also due to the constant storylines we see in the media or in ads trying to sell us things. We may see an ad for a fast food joint saying we should want to eat their delicious burgers but then a minute later see an add for a fat loss pill telling us we should be skinny and toned. How confusing is that crap?

I know I personally have a lot of storylines in my life I must challenge and ask myself, why do I think this to be true. As we start realizing what the stories in our life actually are, we can do something amazing, we can re-write those stories. We can write them to align with who and what we love and give us peace and clarity in our lives. The very last seen of the Hunger Games, Peeta and Katniss are playing in a fields with their kids years after the rebellion. Peeta asks Katniss “You love me, Real or Not Real” and she answers him “Real”. What beautiful example of what we find on the other end when we question our thoughts and re-write our own stories.